#SoCS Mar. 4/17 – Project

04 Mar 2017 31 Comments

by Ritu in Socs, Thoughts Opinions & Memories Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Linda’s #SoCS prompt for this week…

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “project.” Use it as a verb, a noun, or both. Have fun!

I think after the incident that happened to me last week give me a fair reason to be scared. A decent reason to feel like I shouldn’t do certain stuff again. A valid point made that cars can be dangerous.

But do I allow an isolated incident to colour my future?

After all, I am lucky enough to be here after the accident. Fortunate to be walking around and to still have a vehicle at my disposal.

Do I feel scared? Nervous? Panicky?

Yes.

Will I let these feelings dictate how I live my life?

No.

Yes, I do have fears. Flash backs occur at the slightest trigger, like when the wind was blowing. The thought of the car veering off the road, possibly because of a gust of wind panicked me so much? Driving by the site of the accident was surreal. Getting behind the wheel could have been really tough.

But no. I am not going to allow my fears to dictate my life. And I am not going to project those fears onto my children.

I made a choice, after the collision with a motorway central reservation barrier, that I would get back behind the wheel. I chose to try and get over the scene that runs through my mind several times a day, of my car spinning round and round into the oncoming traffic, so that the children don’t ever feel worried when in the car with me.

I need them to understand that accidents do happen, even to the most careful drivers. As someone said to me “That’s why they’re called ‘accidents’. You don’t plan them. If they were planned they would be called ‘on purposes’.”

I want them to be the kind of people who are able to get back on the horse after falling off, without fear.

I hope that they don’t think of incidents like this as a failure of sorts, but instead an opportunity to do better next time. We are learning all the time, and this accident was a learning curve for me too.

I guess when you think of it like this, it is all about the fixed vs. growth mindset thinking. I could shut down, convinced I would be in many more accidents, so that’s it. No cars or driving for me. Or I treat it like a lesson, and get back into that driving seat, take it easy, and keep going with life as I was before, thinking positively.

You see the way I react to incidents that occur in my life, project a kind of standard of reaction onto those around me. If I want the kids to be strong, resilient people, I need to be that too.

But equally, I need to makes sure I don’t overdo things too quickly too. I may be Supermum in their eyes but I am no Superwoman really. I need recovery time, and they need to see that, so they understand there are also times in life when it;s okay to take a step back, recuperate, then get on with living.

As long as I stay positive, I think  I’ll project the right emotions, that will allow them to be able to handle situations like this in a positive manner too.

And there you have it… My Stream of Consciousness this morning, pure and unadulterated!

31 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Judy E Martin
    Mar 05, 2017 @ 20:35:07

    You have a wonderful attitude Sis and are brilliant role model for your children 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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  2. mltrautz@yahoo.com
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 22:33:20

    I am glad you survived the incident. I remember sitting in the back of a police car (it was more comfortable than being outside) and telling the officer I didn’t mean to hit the woman (there was no damage to either vehicle but she wouldn’t just drive off) and the officer turned to me and said, “That’s why it’s called an accident.” He was so wonderfully supportive. You are serving your children so well by having a positive attitude to a difficult situation.

    Liked by 1 person

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  3. jacquelineobyikocha
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 21:48:27

    Your attitude is the best way. Keep facing it and it will eventually slip away.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  4. willowdot21
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 20:41:34

    Hugs Sis, you must move forward or you will find everything scares you. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  5. Dan Antion
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 18:45:22

    I’m glad you’re back behind the wheel. Accidents happen. It doesn’t mean they will happen again.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  6. LindaGHill
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 16:23:06

    That’s the attitude! It takes a lot of mindfulness not to project our fears on our kids. Hang on to this mindset and you’ll be fine, and so will your children. 😀 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  7. robbiesinspiration
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 16:04:54

    Keep going, Ritu, the accident is still fresh. It will get easier as time passes.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  8. Trackback: Satiating Saturdays – Be the change you want to see ✨ – Emotions That Matter.

  9. Laura
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 13:24:03

    Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. I had a traumatic incident several years ago and although I still drive, I haven’t driven on the interstate since. I wish I could just push myself to get back into that traffic but I am too fearful. Please do whatever it takes to get your courage back. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  10. Heartafire
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 12:29:41

    Having been in a horrendous car crash myself I can reLate to all of what you are saying. It took a long time to overcome my anxiety. I am glad you are well.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  11. Marcus Ampe
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 11:39:25

    Take care … treat your neck properly. Talk about what happened and get it off your chest. As soon as you can go back behind the steering wheel.

    Good luck & Bless God.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • Ritu
      Mar 04, 2017 @ 12:01:22

      Thank you Marcus. I have managed to do a couple of very short drives already, but I’m not pushing it, more for the health sake than anything else. 🙂

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      Reply

  12. Erika Kind
    Mar 04, 2017 @ 11:07:50

    Scary things happen. Sometimes it doesn’t mean that we did something wrong but they force a different or extended kind of thinking OR such incidents are not meant to teach us in the first place but keep us from something worse!! Due to you staying at home for the whole week and resting might have kept you from doing something you might never know! So, I absolutely agree: we must never let us limit by fears. If there is no obvious thing we might have done wrong then perhaps it was about something else. But of course, cars can be weapons and this clear insight can be the important lesson that might keep you from something in the future!!

    Liked by 3 people

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