…but you’re ok…

Racism…

I don’t really think I’ve ever been a victim. Well, there’s not any real incident that I can recall in my 40 years on this planet, that makes me fume and think, “How offensive! Someone’s just been racist to me!”

Then I think a little deeper. It’s not always just cut and dried, is it? I can clearly recall a conversation at 6th form, when the girls in my class were 16-18, starting the whole pub/club social life, and a certain girl, who I always got on well with, was commenting on the cab drivers they always seemed to get. “And they are always those greasy p***s! [to me] but you’re ok!”

All through my school life I was a minority. In a private girls school, and for most of the time, I was the only coloured skinned girl. A meek, quiet little Sikh girl. I’d never experienced any differentiation from my classmates and friends, though as we got older, most assumed that Ritu wouldn’t be out in the evenings (which was true, I was a good Indian girl!)

So, that comment, I laughed off, saying that geographically that was incorrect anyway, I was not Pakistani! And then I didn’t really think much of it… But, some people may have taken extreme offence to the comment.

Again, cultural stereotyping hit when I went out with some old work colleagues for the first time. So, we were showing party tricks, and when it was my turn, I, ahem, showed a lovely way of folding your napkin, to make it look like a male appendage (flesh coloured napkins made it all the more effective!) and someone exclaimed, “Ritu! We thought you were a good Indian girl!” Well, actually, yes, I am, but I’m also human too, born and bred here in the UK, grown up with the same surroundings as your average Brit ( with the Indian/Kenyan masala thrown in!)

I’ve always been taught to be a tolerant person, educate the ignorant. If someone has a question, however silly, about my culture or religion, I’m happy to answer it, if I can. I’d rather someone felt they could come to me and ask why my ‘people’ wear those things on their head, or what am I wearing that bangle on my wrist for? Or my favourite, ” How come you have so many uncles/aunties/brothers/sisters?” (Extended Indian family! A great thing! One to post about later,me thinks!)

My best friend, and someone I think of as a big sister, is Muslim, and over the years we had many comments thrown our way, about how come a Sikh girl and Muslim girl could be so close… Why not? I’d ask. We’re all human. I don’t check people’s cv’s before befriending them! Her family are like my own, (yes, I know, as if my extended family isn’t big enough already!) and when I go there, I respect their beliefs, as she does ours when she’s with us.

After 9/11, again, I didn’t really feel any negativity, but my Dear Pops, with his turban, had a few small incidents, where the ignorants assume all turban wearing Sikhs were Muslim like Bin Laden. And my brother, with his huge mixed bag of friends, seemed safe, out and about. Had he been in a group of Asian lads though, it might not have been the same.

Maybe we’ve been out, and someone has thrown an off colour remark in our direction, but I think selective hearing just kicks in, as I just tend to smile at the person and carry on whatever I’m doing.

So, have I experienced racism? I’m not sure… Ignorance definitely, but with a smile and with my words, I hope I have helped some people along the way, educated them so they don’t ‘tar’ all communities with the same brush used for a select few (extremists anyone? From any/every religion/culture)

Your thoughts….

My interactive peeps!

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