Friday Fiction With Ronovan # 5- On A Saturday!

Friday Fiction with Ronovan… Yes I know it’s now Sunday, but hey, I needed time for other pressing issues, the last two nights, so here I am! The prompt post is here.

Challenge This Week:

  • Pick your favorite song and use the title for the title of your story. No, you are not to write a story about how you like the song.
  • Get rid of adverbs outside of your dialogue.
  • No word count limit this week.

Finding my one favourite song in itself was a challenge, I love so many

So my song, a particular favourite, is Don’t Let Go, by En Vogue.

It was poignant when Hubby Dearest and I were dating, and I still love the words to this day.

And no adverbs??!!

Oh this will be a toughie!!!

Here goes!

 

Don’t Let Go

“Don’t let go!”

That’s what he said to me, just before my grip loosened.

I didn’t mean to.  I mean, I had tried hard to hold on, but after 15 minutes of holding his feet, as he dangled over the edge of the bridge, I couldn’t do it.  He was heavy, and I’m just a slight lad myself.

It was all his idea.

He’d seen all these amazing graffiti-covered bridges and he wanted to ‘tag’ one too.  It had only been a couple of months since we had started spraying…leaving our mark around the local area, you know, the school hall walls, the bus shelter Ad boards.

But this, well it was a totally different ball game.  I had only been joining in to seem cool, you know, one of the gang.

Yet here we were, standing on top of this bridge.  The only way he said he could reach was by being held, as he dangled, upside down, and I had to grab hold of his feet.

I don’t know what masterpiece he was trying to create but our quick usual ‘tag’ that took a couple of minutes, seemed to take forever.  It was getting dark when we had reached there, and there were a few cars that had passed under the bridge, but none had stopped to see what we were doing.

But I felt myself tiring, and my hands couldn’t hold on for much longer. I told him to hurry up. I told him that I couldn’t hold on much longer, but he carried on.

Then, just as he said it… “Don’t let go!” my hands gave up, and as I looked up, there was a truck driving towards us, headlights beaming brightly….

Right, so I have read, and reread this so many times, I can’t tell of there are adverbs in there or not! It is totally different to the message of the song, but hey, it was the title that was the inspiration!

You can be my teachers now, mark it, tell me if adverbs slipped in, and what you think!

Oh Ronova, you make us work hard!!!!

23 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. PrairieChat
    Dec 19, 2015 @ 23:08:24

    I really enjoyed your story and enjoyed the music.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  2. Tessa
    Dec 18, 2015 @ 13:17:27

    ooops…nice story

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  3. willowdot21
    Dec 18, 2015 @ 12:09:00

    I love this and I could see it all in my mind’s eye as I read it. Brilliant I have a lot to learn. xx

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  4. Trackback: Friday Fiction with Ronovan Writes Prompt #5 Entries: THE LINKS | ronovanwrites
  5. Ronovan
    Dec 17, 2015 @ 23:06:38

    The adverbs used didn’t get in the way of the story. That’s one thing to remember. LOTS of adverbs take away. And your story was written as though a person were speaking and telling a story. We speak in adverbs, but for those parts that are not dialogue or interior monologue, that’s where you need to be concerned with. Your story was great.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  6. Trackback: Friday Fiction With Ronovan # 5- On A Saturday! | wwwpalfitness
  7. wafflemethis
    Dec 14, 2015 @ 23:00:38

    This is great sis. A good story well written☺

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  8. edwinasepisodes
    Dec 14, 2015 @ 08:12:10

    Loved the story Ritu and it fitted perfectly with the song title, despite the fact that he did let go at the end! Really gripping (if you pardon the pun)!!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  9. Erika Kind
    Dec 13, 2015 @ 22:14:32

    You are right………. it was all his idea… lol! I love the song and its background, sis!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

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