I’ve treated myself to a bit of a cultural education this week.
Now I’ve always known that in Punjabi, we have specific names for different relations, so, with one word we can convey exactly how someone is related to us, more or less.
In English, if I said Aunty, you would need to ask how, so I’d have to explain she’s my mother’s sister, or mothers brothers wife, etc. why use do many words, when just one can convey so much?
I thought I’d give you all a lesson in Punjabi relation names!
Your nuclear family
Mataji/Maaji – mother
Pitaji/Papaji – father
Veerji/bhraji – brother
Bhenji/Didi – sister
Pati – husband
Patni – wife
Soura – father in law
Saas – mother in law
Jijaji – sister’s husband
Bhabiji – brother’s wife
Let’s go one step further
Nanaji – Maternal grandfather
Naniji – Maternal grandmother
Dadaji/Babaji – Paternal grandfather
Dadiji/Bibiji- Paternal grandfather
So,then there is
Pota – grandson, son’s son
Poti – grand daughter, son’s daughter
Dota – grandson, daughter’s son
Doti – grand daughter, daughter’s daughter
A step further? Ok,
Par Nanaji – maternal great grandfather
Par Nanaji – maternal great grandmother
Par Dadaji – paternal great grandfather
Par Dadiji – paternal great grandmother
Which needs
Parota – great grandson
Paroti – great granddaughter
Uncles and aunts? Yup, heck I’m just getting started!!
Tayaji – paternal uncle, Father’s older brother
Taiyji – paternal aunt, father’s older brother’s wife
Chachaji – paternal uncle, father’s younger brother
Chachiji – paternal aunt, father’s younger brother’s wife
Bhuaji – paternal aunt, father’s sister
Phupherji – paternal uncle, father’s sister’s husband
Mamaji – maternal uncle, mother’s brother
Mamiji – maternal aunt, mother’s brother’s wife
Masiji – maternal aunt, mother’s sister
Maserji – maternal uncle, mother’s sister’s husband
Then you need nephews and nieces!
Bhatija – nephew, brother’s son
Bhatiji – niece, brother’s daughter
Bhanja – nephew, sister’s son
Bhanji – niece, sister’s daughter
Cool? Confused yet? No? Ok, more!!!
Jeth – husband’s older brother
Jethani – husband’s older brother’s wife
Deor/devar – husband’s younger brother
Darani/de rani – husband’s younger brother’s wife
Nanaan – husband’s sister
Nandoya – husband’s sister’s husband
Saala – wife’s brother
Salehaar – wife’s brother’s wife
Saali – wife’s sister
Sadu – wife’s sister’s husband
Phew!!
Now, I already knew most of these. I’ve grown up with them, and apart from one or two which I checked with my mother in law (MIL) I was quite impressed with myself! Then she opened a whole other can of worms! There were more differentiated names ??!! Really? I thought that was plenty! Oh no, there are different names for your husband’s family too! Plus she didn’t know all of them, but if I learned something new, I’ll share with you too!
Dadora – husband’s paternal grandgather
Dadez – husband’s paternal grandmother
Nanora – husband’s maternal grandfather
Nanez – husband’s maternal grandmother
Malora – husband’s maternal uncle
Mamez – husband’s maternal uncle’s wife
That’s all she knew, and she offered to find out more, but by the. My head was buzzing!!!! I know some of you will think, OMG!! I’ll stick to uncle, aunt, cousin etc… But isn’t it great that with one word I can tell you so much about that person and their connection to me? Granted it doesn’t always trip off the tongue. I have to think and double check, but I love it! One day my children will fully understand it too… I hope!!
I love my culture!!
P.S. Did I miss anything??
susielindau
Mar 05, 2017 @ 18:33:56
Is there going to be a test? 🙂
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 18:53:48
I could rustle one up!!! 🤗
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Traci York
Mar 05, 2017 @ 16:26:41
Wow! What an amazingly simple, yet confusing as all get out, way to refer to relatives! Thanks for hurting my brain (in a good way) so early on a Sunday morning, Ritu! grin
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 16:27:35
Lol!!!! Glad you enjoyed!@! 😚😚😚
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angelanoelauthor
Mar 05, 2017 @ 16:04:13
I loved reading this list! It reminds me of the power of words to convey different meanings. I am curious though, does Punjabi have any words for “step” relations?
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 16:05:52
Sautela or sauteli means male or female step relations so Sautela baap is step dad, sauteli ma step mum etc!
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lilhiddentreasures
Mar 05, 2017 @ 15:56:56
This is awesome! The chinese is the same! There’s a word for every relationship so you know if it is the sister-in-law on husband side of the 2nd brother or sister-in-law from your own brother etc… But you are way ahead of me… I can’t remember all their titles and I get super confuse. Nice to learn a little Punjabi culture!
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 16:01:26
Oh there are even more Lilian!!! But it’s so cool that one word can give you so much info!!
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Lisa Orchard
Mar 05, 2017 @ 15:26:36
Wow! That’s interesting! Thanks for sharing! 🙂
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 15:48:38
Thanks for reading Lisa! 😚
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You Can Always Start Now
Mar 05, 2017 @ 15:24:16
We used to get into second cousins or first cousin once removed and that was confusing!!
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 15:48:18
Now I can’t understand that concept at all!!!
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Parul Thakur
Mar 05, 2017 @ 13:18:24
Oh that’s a mouthful. I know Hindi ones but Punjabi is new.
Btw – Maternal grandmother would be Naniji, isn’t it?
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 13:51:08
Yes. Nanima. Nanaji!
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 13:53:14
Nanaji… my spellchecker keeps changing it lol!! Naniji
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Parul Thakur
Mar 05, 2017 @ 14:26:53
Ha ha!
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Gay Stepdad
Mar 05, 2017 @ 12:36:15
omg how do you remember all these…wait till I show this to my pati….
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 13:48:37
Lol!!!!! After 40 years… it’s nearly second nature now!!! Pati… lol! 😂
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Gary
Mar 05, 2017 @ 11:23:48
Well, that totally cleared that one up 😳
Always good to read cultural posts though…in fact it’s awesome after watching news that’s so negative these days #GaTu
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 11:50:17
He he!!! Confusion…but organised confusion Gary!!!
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Gary
Mar 05, 2017 @ 11:52:31
Ha ha, that’s organised 😱 I could read that all day and still get lost lol
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 11:54:11
But once you get your head around it… it’s pretty straight forward… in a roundabout kinda way! 😉
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Gary
Mar 05, 2017 @ 13:11:29
I’m sure it is…however, for future reference and potential book characters you are now my “Go to” girl on this matter 😇
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 13:50:50
Any time!!! #GaTu 😇
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Gary
Mar 05, 2017 @ 14:59:58
You might regret that 😊
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 15:09:38
Never!
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Gary
Mar 05, 2017 @ 15:42:46
Never say never…although that migh be a Bond film 🤔
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 15:49:12
OK… I’ll say …no regrets!!!
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Gary
Mar 05, 2017 @ 16:01:08
I can live with that…although….you don’t have a billion names for that too do you???? #GaTu
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 16:03:42
If pushed… I could find details a few… remember I have other languages under my belt too!!!
Hakuna Matata -Swahili
Koi pashtava nahin -punjabi…
Fikar not – Punjablish! 😜
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Gary
Mar 05, 2017 @ 17:36:46
Nooooo lol….I need to get to grips with this post first! Although, now I seriously do know where to come for character info wrt diversity 💖
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 18:08:06
🤗🤗🤗
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Monster Mermaid
Mar 05, 2017 @ 10:45:43
Thats amazing….its wonderful to have all these words…even if it takes a while to get the head around them!Past aunt uncle grandparents etc I always have trouble placing relatives. Nice one Rita.
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 10:47:41
It’s mind boggling but makes sense too… if you know what I mean!!
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Monster Mermaid
Mar 05, 2017 @ 10:57:08
It makes perfect sense!…I never know who my mother is referring too when she talks about second cousins twice removed!we need this in English 🙂
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 11:05:11
😂 too true. I’ve never understood the whole once removed thing!!!
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Jo (Fallen Angel)
Mar 05, 2017 @ 10:44:13
Thank you for this, although I did think it was going to simplify things but I’m totally confused ha ha! I guess once you know them it’s easy, right?!
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Ritu
Mar 05, 2017 @ 10:47:04
Lol!!! Sorry!! Actually I still get confused.. but at the ripe ole she of 41 I’m getting the hang of em all!!!
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Anna
Dec 19, 2016 @ 19:24:46
Wow, impressive. Thanks for the lesson. Very interesting. It may at first look confusing, but I see some logic in it. I have a short and very little memory though…
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Ritu
Dec 19, 2016 @ 21:11:26
Lol! But it makes sense!
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joey
Dec 17, 2016 @ 21:03:40
Oh, now see, that’s freakin brilliant! I think there should be words for all these things in English, too, but our language is too young to have evolved this much. We also need words for stepparents and something better for life partner/boyfriend/girlfriend… Ugh. Now, I can’t imagine memorizing all of these, but if they were part of our language on the regular, they’d be VERY helpful!
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Ritu
Dec 17, 2016 @ 21:06:06
It makes great sense but can be hard to learn initially lol!
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joey
Dec 17, 2016 @ 21:06:26
I bet!
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New Journey
Dec 17, 2016 @ 03:11:08
That’s truly amazing….no way could I ever remember all of that…and such beautiful words…..kat
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Ritu
Dec 17, 2016 @ 09:55:42
Oh they are but soooo confusing even for us!
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Tikeetha T
Dec 14, 2016 @ 17:52:35
LOL. This is so cool. I’m totally confused.
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Ritu
Dec 14, 2016 @ 18:52:18
It’s a confusing thing to learn but useful and practical once known!!!
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PatchworkKat
Dec 14, 2016 @ 16:32:42
I love this! Learning about different cultures and languages makes my native English seem so unnecessarily complicated! Thanks for sharing. 🙂
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Ritu
Dec 14, 2016 @ 17:18:07
Lol! Glad you enjoyed it!!!
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syl65
Dec 14, 2016 @ 15:21:22
Thank you for the Punjabi lesson!! I find it best to print it out to avoid getting dizzy 😵😊
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Ritu
Dec 14, 2016 @ 17:17:42
Probably a good of thing Syl!!!
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syl65
Dec 14, 2016 @ 17:27:54
Yes.😄
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charlypriest
Dec 14, 2016 @ 10:37:10
And I have trouble naming the person that is the son of my cousin…..What would he be to me by the way?
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Ritu
Dec 14, 2016 @ 17:16:00
Lol! Depends on how your cousin is related to you!!!
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charlypriest
Dec 14, 2016 @ 17:46:27
Even more details….
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Erika Kind
Dec 14, 2016 @ 10:02:58
Wow!!! This is really cool! So, everything is clarified… but… how long does it take until that vocabulary is completely learned???
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Ritu
Dec 14, 2016 @ 17:15:15
I still can’t remember them all sis and I’m over 40!!!
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Erika Kind
Dec 14, 2016 @ 20:38:40
Haha… what a lovely excuse, isn’t it… lol!
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Ritu
Dec 14, 2016 @ 21:07:37
Hee hee!
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Erika Kind
Dec 14, 2016 @ 21:19:34
😁😁
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susieshy45
Dec 14, 2016 @ 09:03:28
Ritu,
I think it is interesting and great that there are names for every possible relation, with whom one might interact in one’s life. It also shows a culture that is willing to nurture and perpetrate relationships between human beings. In a world that is slowly growing apart rather than drawing nearer, these nuances are the small things that show us that life is still worth it.
Susie
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Ritu
Dec 14, 2016 @ 09:10:54
And long may it continue ! I do try to teach my kids!!!! But I fear it will die out as less youngsters are aware of these special names xx
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susieshy45
Dec 14, 2016 @ 09:30:27
Yeah, I so understand- there needs to be a dictionary or a reference book so people who want to can refer to it when needed. When I reached my husband’s family which is a large family as compared to mine, I had to learn names of how people are addressed- I used the same names as my husband for each of the relatives and those names stuck in my mind.
It is an oral tradition that needs to be carried to the next generation.
Susie
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Ritu
Dec 14, 2016 @ 09:41:51
We can but try 😃
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Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC
Sep 24, 2016 @ 16:50:55
Fascinating – and I had no idea before reading this. Thanks so much for sharing.
Of course my first reactions are brain-based. One of the areas of challenge as we age (and with ADD/EFD from the get-go), are names and nouns – the “hand me the thing-a-ma-bob on the dookickey” and “I can’t introduce you ’cause I can’t recall her name” problems. 🙂
I wonder if having so many specific names reinforced through a lifetime is neuro-protective in some way – strengthening the areas where those bits are filed.
1- Do native speakers retain the memory of all those names throughout the lifetime? It would appear so, since you checked with your MIL.
2- Do those who remain in India retain them more reliably than “transplants” to other cultures – if not, does noun-strength transfer to the second language?
3- Using scanning technology, are there differences between specific areas of the brains of those with these traditions and those without (like Americans or Brits, for example)?
I doubt there’s been a study on this arena in particular, but we could potentially learn a lot about healthy brain aging if somebody would take it on.
Science has discovered that growing up bi-lingual is protective against dementia, and learning new languages in adulthood helps keep the brain sharp as well. The more we use it, the less we lose it.
xx,
mgh
(Madelyn Griffith-Haynie – ADDandSoMuchMore dot com)
– ADD Coach Training Field founder; ADD Coaching co-founder –
“It takes a village to educate a world!”
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Ritu
Sep 24, 2016 @ 17:14:56
I think that as we grow up with these titles being bandied around, it’s second nature to us to remember them! But if our elders don’t reinforce then we would forget too!
But there’s always the trusty ‘aunty-ji’ or ‘ uncle-ji’ to fall back on if we forget!!!!
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Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC
Sep 24, 2016 @ 17:29:03
I live in a small apartment building with only 6 unusually large apartments that are a bit pricey, so every unit but mine has 2-4 occupants who share space to save money.
There are several colleges within walking distance, with a seemingly large population of students from other countries, especially in the grad programs.
My landlord targets students, so I have had the pleasure of getting to know a few delightful (and highly intelligent) Indian grad students during their time here.
I have learned quite a bit about their culture from what they have shared with me, and I am learning more from blogs like yours. Fascinating – and not anything taught in American schools or featured in the movies that make it here.
xx,
mgh
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Ritu
Sep 24, 2016 @ 18:18:58
Real life education…. much better than school sometimes!!!! I’m all for people asking me things if they aren’t sure. I’d rather educate them correctly rather than let them live in a mist of stereotypes!
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Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC
Sep 24, 2016 @ 19:03:33
The more we interact with people from all over the world, the less we are likely to stereotype – as stigma reduces. That’s one of the things I love about theatre as well – it is one of the few tools we have to teach empathy, done right.
xx,
mgh
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Ritu
Sep 24, 2016 @ 19:06:19
Very true… I’m partial to a bit of theatre… being an English and Drama graduate myself!!!
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Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC
Sep 24, 2016 @ 19:12:12
I recall that about you — me too, as you seem to know.
I used to love playing the “villains” and making them as human as the script allowed to help the audience drop a few of their knee-jerk judgments about the behavior of others. None of us are villains in our own minds. (Well, most of us are not, thank God!)
xx, mgh
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Ritu
Sep 24, 2016 @ 19:21:14
I love using g drama with my nursery students! It’s a great way to teach young children things 😊
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Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC
Sep 24, 2016 @ 19:34:04
I talked with an arts teacher only last night who will be producing a show with them – Once on This Small Island. It’s due to be shown at a well-known arts center here, so her even her most recalcitrant 9th-graders are totally psyched about it.
I volunteered to help with some acting coaching (used to do that) and she took my card. I hope she calls, because I would love being even a small part of the project, touching again my theatre roots.
xx,
mgh
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Ritu
Sep 24, 2016 @ 20:35:59
It is an amazing tool to help teach kids!!!
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Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC
Sep 24, 2016 @ 20:43:01
and adults! xx, mgh
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Ritu
Sep 24, 2016 @ 20:43:42
Oh yeah!!! Xx
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edwinasepisodes
Feb 18, 2015 @ 20:16:38
Wow! That was pretty heady reading! I think the principle is great. Like you said you know exactly who everyone is in relation to you, your husband,your grand-dad’s older cousin etc! However. you need to have one hell or a vocabulary (not to mention good memory)!
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Ritu
Feb 18, 2015 @ 20:20:23
I guess it helps thatvwe hear all this from a young age, so you just grow up with it! My brothers’s wife is Finnish, so she’s done an amazing job of learning them!! She knows all the main ones! 😉
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edwinasepisodes
Feb 18, 2015 @ 20:24:48
Fair play to her, that couldn’t have been easy. I think it’s great that your own children will learn them as well. Their little heads will be full 🙂
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Ritu
Feb 18, 2015 @ 20:26:24
Oh yes!!! They ask all sorts of questions, and I guess it cements everything in their minds! 😊
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Darell Grant
Feb 06, 2015 @ 07:24:23
Pretty impressive
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Ritu
Feb 06, 2015 @ 07:26:29
And a tad confusing! My Hubby Dearest, born into the culture still gets confused!
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Corina
Feb 05, 2015 @ 22:40:49
So much to remember and so much to forget!
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Ritu
Feb 05, 2015 @ 22:49:10
Indeed! 😊
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mrsbearfoot
Feb 05, 2015 @ 20:34:10
As a former co-worker of mine and I used to say, “My brain is full. Can I go home?!” That was quite a lesson! Thank you! 🙂
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Ritu
Feb 05, 2015 @ 20:35:03
Lol! You’re welcome!
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weggieboy
Feb 05, 2015 @ 19:14:09
Whew!
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Ritu
Feb 05, 2015 @ 19:45:25
Indeed!!!
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A Muslim Latina
Feb 05, 2015 @ 15:22:26
Lol I remember marrying hubby, had to learn what to call his siblings..and a few relatives that live around them. Lol..
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Ritu
Feb 05, 2015 @ 15:47:08
😂
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The V-Pub
Feb 05, 2015 @ 13:07:51
I can see how someone not familiar with the language may make a mistake! That’s a lot to learn! Thanks for sharing!
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Ritu
Feb 05, 2015 @ 13:41:05
Even those who know the language suffer!!! 😀
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sunsetdragon
Feb 05, 2015 @ 11:08:23
Hmm interesting.
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thebantamblogger
Feb 05, 2015 @ 09:57:28
I am confused already hahaha!!
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Ritu
Feb 05, 2015 @ 10:18:49
😲
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amommasview
Feb 05, 2015 @ 09:33:42
Oh my… I had to read and read and read this again and again after liking… I am not sure if I really like it. I am just trying to imagine who many different words you have to learn to cover the entire family… Hehehe. I don’t like it. I actually love it. Thanks for sharing this 🙂
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Ritu
Feb 05, 2015 @ 10:18:23
It’s confusing, yes, but clear at the same time, if you know what I mean?!
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amommasview
Feb 05, 2015 @ 10:31:10
I totally agree.
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