Thoughts Opinions & Memories | But I Smile Anyway...

One Liner Wednesday – #1LinerWeds – Parenting 101

06 Feb 2019 44 Comments

by Ritu in #1linerweds, Thoughts Opinions & Memories Tags: #1linerweds, Blog, Blog Post, Blogger, Blogging, Linda G Hill, One Liner Wednesday, Parenting

“If I have to say your name/it again…?”
Ritu and every other parent out there!

Okay, so this isn’t going to be a simple one-liner… is it ever with me?

You read the above.

I’m currently considering the overused line above, that I definitely uttered today, at least three times, in the same situation!

What is it with kids not listening?

And why do I utter these empty threats?

I should really learn.

Saying anything to children of a certain age will gain you nothing.

(Unless you’re promising lots of sweet/TV time [the little uns] or V-Bucks for Fortnite and unlimited access to mobiles [older kids], then they listent o anything you want.)

Yet I still have these battles of wills with my kids, and sometimes my pupils at school.

Am I expecting too much?

Should a child jump as soon as we tell them to do something?

Or is it fine for them to drag their heels, dawdle for as long as they want, then stomp around in a huff when they are late for school?

I mean this morning, I used that quote/phrase to the demon teen Lil Man at least six thousand times, to get him out of bed…

And tonight, I had to repeat myself about the same to tween trouble, Lil Princess just to get her to put her shoes on so we could go home from my in-laws’ place…

And they didn’t rush/hurry/listen.

Yet I am still here, back home, in one piece. Nothing major happened to anyone because we were a few moments later than usual.

But, the point is, shouldn’t they be listening to me/us the first time?

I mentioned empty threats before, because they are.

I admit I tell them I will take phones/internet access away. Or that I will cancel a meet up with their friends.

Yet I don’t actually see it through… the fall out after something like that is just too big for me to deal with after a day at work!

And when they meet their friends, it’s a chance for me to catch up with the mums too, which I don’t get to do often enough!

It’s just easier to nag at them a little longer, endure the stomping and keep on going because the mood they’re in means they will disappear into their bedrooms for an hour after we get home, and I get peace before my sweet(er) children resurface!

So, yeah… that was my one liner!

Written for Linda’s #1LinerWeds prompt.

One-Liner Wednesday – In Sync

Nominations are Now Open!

01 Feb 2019 26 Comments

by Ritu in Thoughts Opinions & Memories

Did you get thinking?
The nominations are open!
Make sure you nominate your favourite blogs 🙂

Chai And A Chat #17 #ChaiAndAChat

28 Jan 2019 43 Comments

by Ritu in Chai and a Chat, Thoughts Opinions & Memories Tags: #ChaiAndAChat, Blog, Blog Post, Blogger, Blogging, Chai and a Chat, Life, Updates

Well hello, there Peeps! Time to sit down and kick back with a drink and little sweet treat for the last time in January! (Can you believe it?)

If we were sipping chai together I’d ask you if you managed to see the Full Blood Wolf Moon on Monday? I still don’t know why it was a wolf moon, though I did try to catch it. But who’s gonna stay up until 2am and wait until 5.30am on a work night? Not this teacher… Still managed to get a lovely shot of the moon at 7.30am the next morning, as it was still bright… followed by an amazing sunrise shot the day after. Makes me wish I really had a better camera, but my phone doesn’t do too bad, does it? Thank you Huawei P20 Pro!

If we were sipping chai together I’d let you know that the week went relatively smoothly, as far as it can in the life of a teacher/wife/mother/daughter… You’ve read about my average weeks. You know the score. Still, things are never just simple. On Thursday I awoke to find out that my manager was off sick. She is never ill so that always worries me. But I have learned that if your body is telling you to rest, you have to, and I was glad she listened to hers. Knowing a supply would be in to cover our Reception class (my manager and I share this class, but on Thursday, I teach in Nursery so couldn’t cover), I arrived a little earlier to help set the class up and prep the supply teacher. On arrival at school, it became apparent that she wasn’t the only one off sick or out for the day. The Head was at a meeting, the deputy head was sick (another one who is NEVER ill!), and of course one of our class Teaching Assistants was sick too, along with others. The bugs had hit the adults hard! So, it was a slightly fraught day, with other events that helped to keep us all on our toes… But we survived!
If we were sipping chai together I’d then go on to say that crazy evening of mine which I mentioned last week was to happen on the same day! So, armed with one child, we rushed home, and she got herself preened for her party, then I deposited her at Bluewater for her party. I rushed back (as much as you can rush in rush hour traffic) to my in-law’s house to pick up Lil Man who had his cricket training, and dropped him off. Then joined the traffic again so I could pick Lil Princess up. I should have taken the time I had free to browse the shops while I waited, but there were only 20 minutes so I leisurely walked through a small section of Waterstone’s book shop, without buying (so hard!) and headed over to pick her up. It was fascinating to see the group of 10-11-year-olds all sat with phones, or running off to different parts of the restaurant to take selfies… what has this world come to? Last year they were just excited to go to a trampoline park for a party… Then we jumped in the car, and raced back to pick up Lil Man from his training! Hubby Dearest was stuck as he travels back from work during these times so would have found it hard to actually assist with any of the taxi services… I needed a drink that night, but settled for an early night!
If we were sipping chai together I’d mention that I haven’t heard anything back feedback wise from my friend yet, other than he thinks my villainous character is rather naughty! I finished his book and emailed off my feedback. I do find it hard to read and be critical of a person’s work, but after having feedback from trusted friends already on my own manuscript, I can see how important it is to get that honest feedback. I hope he was happy with what I had to say… Now I just wait with bated breath for his opinion of mine…
If we were sipping chai together I’d let you know that though I may not have been as creative this past week, Lil Princess has been really busy! She is loving her watercolour paints and aside from her daily Mickey Mouse drawing, she is stretching herself with painting… check out these fantastic pieces!

If we were sipping chai together I’d tell you she also decided that my face would be a great canvas for her creativity! Three years ago I allowed her to be let loose on my makeup drawer and face. And now, thanks to watching umpteen more makeup videos on YouTube, she felt the need to try again… here is the result. The first pic is three years ago, the second from this weekend. What do you think?

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If we were sipping chai together I’d tell you that I didn’t opt for a cheeky Costa this week, as I didn’t have the chance, but an impromptu trip to the local swimming baths meant I enjoyed the delights of a wishy-washy cuppa and bickie, alongside my Kindle, as we watched them swim! Why swim in this awful cold? I can hear you ask. Well… On Saturday we awoke to no proper internet. It was a tragedy – for the kids anyway. No internet meant the on-demand function wasn’t working on the Sky box or Netflix. It meant that the Xbox couldn’t connect so Fortnite couldn’t be accessed. It meant the PC was unable to allow a weekly fix of Roblox or YouTube… See? Tragedy! What would we do? I suggested reading, painting, playing outside but none of those suggestions were agreeable, then suddenly swimming came into the equation. At least we ended up with happy kids. And the internet? Well, it came back on once we were back. It seems Vodafone were having issues, and we get some sort of recompense for this disaster that struck our household! In fact Hubby is on the phone as I type, hammering out a deal with them… He does love this sort of thing

If we were sipping that chai together, and possibly reaching for cake or cookies I’d tell you I still need to sort out this eating problem of mine! Where is the stop switch on my mouth – eating function?
If we were sipping that chai together, and possibly reaching for cake or cookies I’d mention that I may start up with some of the creative writing challenges soon too. I am feeling rusty…
If we were sipping that chai together, and possibly reaching for cake or cookies I’d say that I hope to really get stuck in with the ‘KonMarie’ tidying too over the next week. I’m trying little sections at a time, but it is a big job on the whole!

Let me know how your week has been Peeps!

Right, so, see you in February then!

Spidey’s Serene Sunday – Part 206

27 Jan 2019 54 Comments

by Ritu in Spidey's Serene Sundays, Thoughts Opinions & Memories Tags: Blog, Blog Post, Blogger, Blogging, KonMarie, Marie Kondo, Spark Joy, Spiderman, Spidey, Spidey's Serene Sunday

“Spark joy.” Marie Kondo

You got the bug too Spidey?

Unless you have been under a rock the last few months, you would have heard of the KonMarie method of tidying up that has hit the world.

A diminutive Japanese woman has found her obsession with tidying up houses has become a huge ‘thing’ around the world.

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A post shared by Ritu Bhathal ✍🏽📚💜 (@ritubhathalwrites)

In its essence, her method is to surround yourself with the things that spark joy in your life. In her words, “If you hold it and you feel ‘Ting!’ that is the joy.”

If what you are holding on to has memories attached, but the item could be excess, she encourages you to remember the memories. They will be with you in your heart and mind, thank the object, then let it go.

Sounds easy?

No!

First of all, I think I’d need a month off work to go through things.

Secondly, I think I’d find it really tough to be so brutal with my ‘things’ A lot make me feel ‘Ting!’!

But, I do get where she is coming from.

I look around a lot of our house and the clutter is all stuff I think we should keep or have, but it hasn’t been moved for months, or years even.

Really, I think if it went, I would feel so much less cluttered in my brain too.

I made a start on shoes and coats. I did my undies and socks. I’ve gone through jeans and leggings.

I have about three bags full of things I have said thank you and goodbye too.

There is so much more.

The rest of the wardrobe. Hubby Dearest’s wardrobe. The Kids wardrobes…

The attic is stuffed with suitcases full of my older Indian outfits and the kids baby clothes.

Do I really need to keep them?

I’m never going to wear them again. The only thing I really want is a couple of the kids early outfits, first shoes etc, and our wedding outfits.

That’s it.

I have boxes of paperwork, from my own old school work to uni work, to miscellaneous stuff that is just there.

Needs to go.

The kitchen. Oh, the kitchen.

Packed with gadgets and spices I have never used, dishes that just sit in a cupboard and need washing if I ever want to use them, enough saucepans to cater for an army – thanks mum, but I don’t think I’ll ever cook that much!

And the special crockery for visitors… never used!

The bathroom. Well, that just needs a gutting out!

And the linen closet. It needs a sort out, a tidy up and a rejig.

But the one thing I really can’t agree on is her premise that less than 30 books are ideal.

She’s not got a clue, has she? Or she didn’t finish her sentence. It should have been “Ideally keep it to less than 30 books-helves!”

But then again, my books spark joy. I feel that ‘Ting!’ when I hold so many of the books I have. Three bookshelves so far, and I could easily fill a fourth with the books piled around my room…

So yeah, I’d love to jump on the #KonMarie bandwagon… if someone wants to give me the time, and a huge skip to throw my accumulated junk into!

So tell me, are you a hoarder like me or a minimalist? Will you be giving the KonMarie method a try?

Chai And A Chat #16 #ChaiAndAChat

21 Jan 2019 45 Comments

by Ritu in Chai and a Chat, Thoughts Opinions & Memories Tags: #ChaiAndAChat, Blog, Blog Post, Blogging, Catch Up, Chai and a Chat

Another week gone by. Grab your drink, it’s time to catch up!

If we were sipping chai together I’d tell you in amazement that this happened! How in the world has my following climbed to over 7000 when I’m posting less??? But thank you all!!!!!

If we were sipping chai together I’d mention that the manuscript sat quietly as I pondered what to do. I am tempted to try and submit to a few agents to see the reaction, before heading down the Indie route. But I have sent a copy to another writerly friend of mine, whose opinion I am very interested in, as he is of the same cultural background as me, so to hear what a fellow British Asian thinks, is rather daunting but necessary. I don’t want my characters portrayals to be too typecast or offensive, so it is important. In return, I am reading his manuscript that he has completed too. It’s a memoir piece and sounds really interesting!
If we were sipping chai together I’d let you know that the observation went well. And now it’s finally out of the way! I can breathe until they tell us the next one is due!
If we were sipping chai together I’d moan about tweenage girls and the bitchiness that seems to start even earlier. Lil Princess had an issue with some of her friends, instigated by another girl, who the others seemed to be scared of, so they were just agreeing with all the unpleasant things the child said, instead of sticking up for their friend. It took a lot of guts for her to tell me what was going on, and it is awful to see your child upset and in tears. The hard thing for me is that I work there, at the school. I could go up to the child in question and go all loco on her. In fact, while trying to cheer her up I said I would go to her and say ” Did you forget whose daughter she was? You’d better check yourself before you wreck yourself!” complete with all the attitudy finger and head shaking. She was insistent that I do it, but obviously, I couldn’t! A couple of parents were spoken to instead, and her teacher and things seem to have been resolved now…

If we were sipping chai together I’d mention that I was featured on Shelley Wilson’s Motivate Me Academy site, as an inspiring woman. I feel honoured to have been asked. Did you get a chance to read? Click here if you didn’t.
If we were sipping chai together I’d tell you that Lil Man had a birthday gathering to attend, at the local shopping centre to watch a film. I dropped him, and waited until I knew what they were watching, so I could be back to pick him up. It was a strange one for me as this is the first time he has been to a ‘party’ like this, in the outside world, with kids who I don’t know and no parents to supervise. Oh my, another little bit of independence for him! Still, I got some shopping time, and me time, which saw me lunching and reading in Costa again!

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If we were sipping chai together I’d tell you my ‘self’ intention is also going to plan, with my weekly bubble bath and book still taking place, and I managed to squeeze in a mani and pedi too this weekend! And I have continued with my handlettering, trying different looks!

If we were sipping that chai together, and possibly reaching for cake or cookies I’d tell you that the coming week is relatively quiet, aside from one fraught evening where I need to get home asap. drive one child to a party, get back and deliver another to training, then get back to pick the first one up. I hope Hubby Dearest remembers he has to pick the other one op from training…
If we were sipping that chai together, and possibly reaching for cake or cookies I’d tell you that I really shouldn’t be eating anything sweet with this drink… The weight has crept on terribly! But I can’t help myself!

Did anything interesting happen in your life last week?

Have a wonderful week ahead Peeps!