Spidey | But I Smile Anyway...

Spidey’s Serene Sunday – Part 239 – Tired

29 Sep 2019 58 Comments

by Ritu in Spidey's Serene Sundays Tags: Blog, Blog Post, Blogger, Blogging, Spiderman, Spidey, Spidey's Serene Sunday, tired

Sustained exhaustion is not a rite of passage. It’s a mark of stupidity.
Jason Fried

Yup, I gotta agree Spidey.

I’ve been fighting this for a while now. The tiredness.

And yet, the last few years, I have worked through it.

Burning the candle at both ends, so to speak, has not been uncommon in my life the last few years. I’m up at 6, pottering, getting lunches ready, tidying the kitchen, having a cup of tea, before being at school for 7.45am, until 5 – 5.30pm.

Every September, the beginning of the school year will weave a web of exhaustion around me, yet I still get home, do my motherly chores after a busy day teaching, keep house as I want to, write, or blog, then read myself to sleep.

Yet this year, it’s different.

I am really happy at school.

The excitement of my new class has kept me going, and though there are some hard children to deal with, I have a lovely bunch, my Beauts, as I have christened them, yet I still keep getting asked “What’s the matter?” or “You looke stressed.” and when I answer that everything is fine, I get the question back, “Are you sure?”

And the truth of the matter is, I really am fine.

I love my job, my family life is wonderful.

I’m just dog tired.

So much so, that I get home and once I finally sit down, I find myself falling asleep almost straight away.

Now you know me, one to read 15-20 books in a month, despite all the rest of the stuff I do, but this month, I am still reading, yet moments after starting, I find I have fallen asleep, and I wake an hour later, realising the kids are still awake, and I am lying on my bed, fully dressed, Kindle now asleep too.

My brain is not running at full right now.

I am running low on creativity.

So I decided that I need to take one element of pressure off myself.

I stopped blogging challenges.

And that has been strange. I am used to writing stories or flash fiction every day, more or less, for years. But I really just couldn’t do it.

So that is why you haven’t seen my name pinging up in your Reader, or inbox as much this last week.

And I don’t know how much longer, but I need to stay on this break for a while, I think.

I’m okay, though. Don’t worry about me. I might just visit the doctor about the extreme tiredness, but I just need to rest my brain a little for a while.

Don’t worry. I shan’t stay away totally.

Spidey won’t stay silent, and I’ll stillpsot my Chai and a Chat catch ups, and I’ll still be reading your posts!

Until I feel creatively full, my Peeps!

Ritu

Spidey’s Serene Sunday – Part 238 – Friends

22 Sep 2019 29 Comments

by Ritu in Spidey's Serene Sundays Tags: Blog, Blog Post, Blogger, Blogging, Friends, Serene Sunday, Spiderman, Spidey, Spidey's Serene Sunday

“A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.”
Bernard Meltzer

Cool quote Spidey!

I went out with some great friends on Friday night.

I don’t have the Buzz to my Woody here, locally. My BFF for the last 25 ish years… but I have a group of wonderful friends locally, The Tootie Frooties, and one of those is my other BFF.

We look out for each other, we laugh, we laugh together, and because our children are friends, we lookout for each others kids too.

We went to a comedy night, had a few drinks and ran late at the comedy night, but went for a quick meal afterwards. It was such a fun night, much needed after a long time without meeting up, sans kids!

My jaw ached the next day from laughing so much, not just from the comedy, but from our own laughs before and after. That is friendship.

And I know, that with them, I can be myself, without anyone having major expectations of me. They know the Ritu they see is the Real Ritu. And I’m not perfect. None of us are. But we are us. And we love each other as we are.

Those are the friendships worth having ❤

So… tell me, how often spend time with your real friends?

Spidey’s Serene Sunday – Part 237 – Me

15 Sep 2019 56 Comments

by Ritu in Spidey's Serene Sundays Tags: Blog, Blog Post, Blogger, Blogging, Motivational, Quotes, Serene, Spiderman, Spidey, Spidey's Serene Sunday, Winnie The Pooh

The things that make me different are the things that make me.
Winnie The Pooh

Gotta love a bit of Pooh Tao, thanks Spidey!

Go on, hands up. Who is guilty of thinking they need to be ‘like’ others to be accepted?

Thinking a certain way, wearing particular clothes, listening to the ‘in’ music, watching the films everyone is raving about… that kind of thing?

Why do we always want to be keeping up with the Joneses? Why can’t we just be ourselves, and why do you think the world won’t accept you as you are?

As a child I was always different from my school peers. There weren’t many Indian girls in my school. I was never singled out because of it, but where they were horseriding and having piano lessons at the weekends, I was going to family weddings and attempting to learn how to read and write my home language, Punjabi (I failed… can speak and understanding fluently, but the reading/writing? Nope!)

We grew up together and as the others were worrying about prospective boyfriends and dates for the ball we had at 15, then discussing the late night bars they began to frequent, and clubs, I was still there, enjoying the music they listened to, and joining in with their chats about crushes on teeny bopper pop idols, and our own real life crushes, but I was also still busy every weekend with my family (it’s huge, there are neverending lists of events and functions to attend, even now!)

It didn’t single me out in a negative way, my friends just knew I wouldn’t be turning up at the non uniform day in a miniskirt and cropped top, despite it being the fashion. I’d be wearing whatever sensible clothes my mum thought were best.

Because that was me. Ratty. Yes, that was my nickname at school. Not because I was bad tempered or anything, but because my full first name is Ratinder, and we watched The Wind In The Willows one day and the character Ratty came up… and so I was christened. One of my oldest school friends still calls me Ratty, over thirty years later!

As I hit university, I admit, I went through the whole fitting in thing. I wore the clothes everyone else did, went to all the clubs, drank all the drinks, and skipped the lectures… but it took me a while to realise that that wasn’t really me.

In all honesty, it took me a good twenty more years to find ‘me’.

Yes I was always, and will always be Ritu the Daughter, Ritu the Sister, Ritu the Wife, Ritu the Daughter-in-Law, Ritu the Mother, Ritu the Colleague, Ritu the Uni friend, Ratty the school mate.

But I no longer conform to what others may expect. I will wear what I want and feel comfortable in. I will eat what I fancy. I will go where I feel a pull to attend, not be forced to go to events that are a drain on my soul. I will laugh. I will cry. I will write. I will read. I will do everything that I enjoy. That makes me, me.

I won’t be a stereotype.

I will be me.

So… tell me, when did you realise it is okay to be YOU?

Spidey’s Serene Sunday – Part 236 – Early Years

08 Sep 2019 36 Comments

by Ritu in Spidey's Serene Sundays Tags: Blog, Blog Post, Bloggier, Blogging, Quote, Serene, Spiderman, Spidey, Spidey's Serene Sundays, Teaching

“It is greater work to educate a child, in a true and larger sense of the world, than to rule a state.”
Willia Ellery Channing

Profoundness today, eh Spidey!

And apt, as always, to my situation.

I have completed my first week in my new classroom, with my first very own class.

A group of 30 children who are my responsibility for the next academic year.

That’s a BIG responsibility.

Yes, they are 4-5 years-old.

No, they aren’t going to learn how to write a novel/solve complex equations/create scientific formulas this year.

But what I will have to teach them is to love learning.

How to hold a pencil
How to count
How to recognise their name and write it
How to begin to read

Simple academics, but on top of that, and more importantly, I need to teach them how to be compassionate, caring individuals. I need to show them that the world doesn’t revolve around them individually, but rather they, and their actions keep our world turning.

I must show then that asking questions is not wrong, but a way of extending their own knowledge. Every question they ask can be explored, investigated.

I have to make sure they develop confidence; conquer the fear of “I can’t do that” and convert it into “I can’t do that, yet.” and further, to “I will try that” onto “I did it!”

It’s a tough job, being an Early Years teacher. The syllabus isn’t as cut and dried as other years.

But I have the joy of (hopefully) creating a stable foundation for my class. A solid beginning to their academic career, so they move forward with an open mind and joy of learning.

So… tell me, what is the first memory you have of school?

Spidey’s Serene Sunday – Part 235 – New Beginnings

01 Sep 2019 25 Comments

by Ritu in Spidey's Serene Sundays Tags: Beginnings, Blog, Blog Post, Blogger, Blogging, Spiderman, Spidey, Spideys Serene Sundays

“Be willing to be a beginner every single morning.”
Meister Eckhart

Thank you for that, Spidey!

Apt for me this weekend, as tomorrow the new school year officially starts.

Yes, I have been back in school for the last two days of last week as staff training (and we had a brilliant training session involving Ian Gilbert of Independent Thinking and Rhythmical Mike, a poetry and spoken word artist, who came to talk about his beginnings and rough start to school life – there is so much to think of, I can’t tell you now, it would need another post), but it was finishing preparations for the new year, and tomorrow the children start, making it the real beginning of the year.

Of course, being in Reception makes things a little different for us. Our children don’t start straight away. They are the littlies, 4-5 year-olds who have never been to school before, so we can’t chuck them in at the deep end. There will be many pupils in my class that I already know, as they will have come up from my old nursery class. But there are ar least 12 new children in each of the two classes who haven’t attended our nursery. So, for the first 2 days, we will be doing home visits, going to see the child and family in their homes, and giving them a quick introduction to us and school, in a setting familiar to the child.

Then they start on Wednesday, for half days. We will build up to full time by the third week of term, which is actually quite fast, in comparison to the last few years.

There will be plenty of settling in time, and we have to assess, or baseline the children, so we know their capabilities at the start.

And this is all new for me.

A new set of beginnings. A whole ream of firsts.

My first own class
My first own classroom
My first year where what I do, is chosen, and driven by me more
My first year where the progress of a whole class is on my shoulders entirely

And I have a group of children who are going to tax me, going to try me, possibly will give me headaches and cause tears of frustration, but I also know that my intention is to make sure they are also the source of smiles for me too, and happiness, and tears of joy, as I see them progressing in the year.

What I am saying is there are some children with very specific needs within the class, which will add a whole different dynamic to my days.

Am I ready for the challenge?

Of course I am!

Am I nervous?

You’re damn right I am!

Will I pull this year off?

Who knows, but what I do know is that I will give it my all to try and give these children the best start to their academic life!

And every day is a new start. There will be ups and downs, but I always keep in my head the fact that the next day is another chance to try again.

So… tell me, do you consider each can a new start?