“Being a teacher and a mother is a really tough double role; you are paid to spend your days nurturing other peoples’ kids, yet feel guilty within, if you need time to look after your own…”
Ritu
By no means is this a dig at anyone who I work with.
I am lucky with my management team. They totally understand that family is a most important part of our lives, and that work/life balance is key to happy teachers and success at school for all.
No.
I am talking about that internal tug of war we educators will all feel, at one time or another, if we decide to start our own families.
The amount of times I have had to argue with myself about letting my class, the parents, and the school down, if I end up taking a day or two off because own child is unwell…
It’s silly really, isn’t it?
Obviously my child should come first, and they do, believe me, but I am also lucky that under normal circumstances, I have their grandparents to help out if they are under the weather. If they are really bad, there are times only mummy will do.
But times like now, when the in-laws are away, it gets hard.
Take today for instance.
Lil Princess was battling with a severe headache on the weekend. She woke up on Monday with a slight ache still, but wanted to soldier on. Dosed up with Calpol, she went to school but I worried about her a lot, as she wasn’t right, and I also had the added joy of Parent’s Evening that night, until 7pm…
She walked to her grandparent’s house at the end of the day and developed a really bad cold, which was what the headache was a precursor to… Head cold. No fun.
Tuesday, she was full of it. Bunged up. Head ache, cough. Temperature.
It was awful for her.
My bro and sis in law were both home and they had already offered to have her the next day, as they knew I had another Parent’s Evening and they happened to be home.
But I felt so bad.
I know this parents meeting is really important. But so is my kid.
Again, I feel thankful. I am lucky enough to have a solution to childcare. And the offer of her being there today too, if she is still not right, is reassuring. I am not fobbing her off on anyone. But the guilt…
The guilt that I am projecting on myself… I should have stayed at home. I should have not thought a toss about work.
Yet I did.
And I left her… (in good hands, of course)
Written for Linda’s #1LinerWeds Challenge
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