“Self-care is not indulgence. It’s self-preservation.”
Audre Lourde
Thank you, Spidey, for another thought-provoking one.
There’s a difference between Self-indulgence and Over-indulgence, let’s get that straight, first off!
I have definitely been known to over-indulge… my belly is proof of that…
But self-indulgence is different. That is excessive or unrestrained gratification of one’s own appetites, desires, or whims. (Oops, might be a bit of over-indulgence there, too…)
Self-care is a different kettle of fish. There is an element of self-indulgence involved, but it is measured. Because you take the time to do something for you, rather than for the pleasure of others.
You get to a point in your life where, if you are a parent, especially, your responsibilities begin to lessen, a tad.
(The worry? That doesn’t go anywhere, but you lose a certain amount of control, so you have to accept it!)
Or, just generally, that point in life arrives, where you realise you don’t need to be living your every minute dancing to someone else’s tune.
It’s fine to abide by the rules.
No one is disputing, that, but there are times when you know it is time to switch off from the world and do what you want.
It could be the obvious self-care regimes, taking time out for a bath, visiting the salon or going for a walk, going window-shopping or reading a book until late in the morning with your cup of tea cooling by your bedside, or whatever you wouldn’t usually make the time to do.
Not selfish, or over-indulgent. Just time for you.
I’ve definitely reached that time, in that I know what I have to do, as well as what I can leave, in order to give me enough time for my family and their needs, as well as time for me.
It’s a wonderful age!
So, Peeps, do you indulge yourself once in a while? 😊
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “the last thing you emptied.” Think of the last thing you emptied or something you empty often and use it as your prompt any way you like. Have fun!
Right now, the last thing I emptied was my wallet…
Lil Man decided to leave a school trip acceptance until the last minute, leaving Hubby Dearest and me scrambling for the cash to pay for the trip!
Don’t you just love kids…
(Thank goodness payday was today, too, otherwise, my bank account would have been emptied too!)
Today I am bringing you a beautiful story written by Sarit Yishay-Levy, and translated by Gilah Kahn-Hoffman.
The Blurb
A mesmerizing novel about three generations of women who have lost each other—and the quest to weave them back into a family. An immersive historical tale spanning the life stories of three women, The Woman Beyond the Sea traces the paths of a daughter, mother, and grandmother who lead entirely separate lives, until finally their stories and their hearts are joined together. Eliya thinks that she’s finally found true love and passion with her charismatic and demanding husband, an aspiring novelist—until he ends their relationship in a Paris café, spurring her suicide attempt. Seeking to heal herself, Eliya is compelled to piece together the jagged shards of her life and history. Eliya’s heart-wrenching journey leads her to a profound and unexpected love, renewed family ties, and a reconciliation with her orphaned mother, Lily. Together, the two women embark on a quest to discover the truth about themselves and Lily’s own origins…and the unknown woman who set their stories in motion one Christmas Eve.
Firstly, I want to say that translated fiction can be quite hard to read. Sometimes things literally get ‘lost in translation’. Phrases used commonly in the original language can sound strange when written to suit a different tongue. However, despite taking a little time to get into it, The Woman Beyond The Sea was a beautiful story about a daughter, her mother, and their relationships. Eliya finds herself in emotional turmoil after her marriage breaks, especially since she was warned against the union by her family. She goes through several unstable phases, including suicidal thoughts, which are not helped by her mother, Lily, who can’t seem to find love or compassion for her only daughter, Lily, herself, is a damaged creature with no stable foundations and far too much heartache, despite having the love of a good man forever behind her and beside her. Ultimately this is a story of discovering one’s self, and in The Woman Beyond The Sea, Lily and Eliya go on a bumpy ride to find out why they feel the way they do about one another and those around them. Sometimes there was repetition and more than one POV in a named POV chapter, but I was immersed in the story and spent an entire day in bed wanting to read more!
About the Author
Sarit Yishai-Levi is a renowned Israeli journalist and author. In 2016 she published her first book, The Beauty Queen of Jerusalem. It immediately became a bestseller and garnered critical acclaim. The book sold more than three hundred thousand copies in Israel, was translated into ten languages, and was adapted into a TV series that won the Israeli TV award for best drama series. It also won the Publishers Association’s Gold, Platinum, and Diamond prizes; the Steimatzky Prize for bestselling book of the year in Israel; and the WIZO France Prize for best book translated into French. Yishai-Levi’s second book, The Woman Beyond the Sea, was published in 2019. It won the Publishers Association’s Gold and Platinum prizes and was adapted for television by Netflix. Yishai-Levi was born in Jerusalem to a Sephardic family that has lived in the city for eight generations. She’s been living with her family in Tel Aviv since 1970.
About the Translator
Gilah Kahn-Hoffmann moved from Montreal to Jerusalem after studying theatre, literature, and communications at McGill University. Starting out as a freelance journalist, translator, writer, and editor, she became a feature writer at The Jerusalem Post and, subsequently, editor of the paper’s youth magazines. Later, during a stint as a writer at Israel Center for the Treatment of Psychotrauma, she discovered how fulfilling it is to work for the benefit of others and moved to NGO work in East Jerusalem and the developing world. In recent years, she’s come full circle to her first loves and spends her best hours immersed in literary translation.
Hello there! I am rather cold. Is it definitely Spring?
Have you got your drink?
If we were having chai, I’d start by saying the week really whizzed by. Time is flying. I don’t know where it is going, but this is scary. It’ll be the end of March, before we know it, and clocks will be changing, and a quarter of 2023 will be done! The school has been busy (when is it not?) It is that time of year when we need to assess the children and have targets for data on our minds. Hard when these little children are still. being affected by the Covid-19 pandemic. The children we have right now are the ones who wouldn’t have been out much. No toddler groups, some had nursery but not fully, and it shows in their communication and personal and social skills. Attention spans are lower than before, too. Still , we go on. I had to do the observations we missed the week before, which all went well, and I got to see a P.E. lesson for children older as one of my observations, which was lovely to watch.
If we were having chai, I’d tell you that one evening, I got back to a surprise package from a lovely author friend of mine from across the Atlantic Ocean! Kay Bratt, she is lovely. She said she would send me a book mark, and she did, along with a whole load of other things! What a treat!
If we were having chai, I’d say that there were two more strikes this week by teachers across the country. Our school wasn’t affected by closures, as such, as only one of the teachers in the appropriate union was striking. This sounds awful, but even though I agree with why we are striking – not just for increased pay, but for increased funding for Education as a whole, since we are all being pulled from pillar to post to be teachers as well as parents, SEN advisor, wellbeing mentor, behaviour specialist… and then some since funding is being withdrawn from so many departments that directly affect children and how they can and will cope in school – I hate to think of some of our kids not being able to come in since for some, we might be the only safe place for them or the guarantee of at least one hot meal a day. And it’s not only the kids. There are families who would have to go without a day’s pay in this current economic climate to be at home with their young children… It’s a double edged sword…
If we were having chai, I’d mention that I feel blessed after a lovely Mother’s Day, where I was spoilt rotten by the kids and Hubby Dearest. We didn’t go out for dinner or anything as there is still someone with a tummy bug in the family… not me, but still, we enjoyed time together.
If we were having chai, I’d brag about my new Lego Orchid, that Lil Princess and I put together! Isn’t it great? I love orchids, but can never keep them alive, or get them to bloom again, so this is the best solution! It is now on my desk in my writing room! And I have a second Flower Bouquet set to make, too!
If we were having chai, I would give you another snippet of Sonu Singh! It was his 9th Gotcha Day with us. I can’t believe it’s been nine years already. I don’t know what life would be like without him here…
This week my kids get an extra day off on Monday as their staff have a training day. I’ll be in all week, though, finishing off Performance Management reviews, as well as data. I think, teaching-wise, it is a pretty ‘normal’ week (Hope I haven’t spoken too soon!) And then early on Sunday morning the clocks ‘spring forward’ meaning an hour less in bed, but blissfully lighter evenings will be upon us!
And while you’re here, did you sign up for my mailing list? I am in the middle of writing an exclusive Chickpea Curry Lit story for my subscribers, and there will be news, tips and even recipes! You know you want to join… go on! Click the pic below to sign up!
But I Smile Anyway... 
