I love my kids.
Last week I touched on the fact that they were both getting older and, well, quite frankly, there is nothing I can do about it.
I guess it is important to embrace it all, and enjoy the fact that there will be a whole lot more ‘Blogger Fodder’ over the next few years!
Take this last week…
I am having to really accept that my little girl, my baby, my Lil Princess, is no longer ‘little’! Watching a film, an s-e-x scene came on. (It was a tame one, honestly, I am not subjecting my children to porn!) Both she and her brother averted their eyes, with the usual kid cries of “Eeeeugh! Disgusting!!! Is it finished yet?!”
Admittedly, I think Lil Man may have been watching through his fingers, but I can’t be sure…!
Then Lil Princess said to me, “Mummy, are they having ‘special cuddles’ then?”
She knows.
She’s nine, and she knows.
I was not prepared for her knowing things like that… not yet! She’s not due for that talk at school until next year!
I actually found out that she was aware what sex was in March. We went shopping for my best friend’s baby shower. I was buying some cutesie bits and bobs, along with the obligatory disposable maternity pants and perinneum massage oil, when she giggled and showed me a tube of nipple cream.
Obviously nipple is a funny word for kids of a certain age.
She went on to find several brands, and then nipple protectors too, giggling at every find.
We had a short conversation as to why these items (not the perinneum massage oil!) were necessary for a new mum.
In the car on the way home, she was obviously feeling quite comfortable with being so open with me, so broached another issue…
“Mummy, when a pregnant lady goes for a poo, what stops the baby coming out too?”
A perfectly sensible question… until you realise that your nine-year-old doesn’t actually believe that babies come from a stork, or the hospital, or some other airy fairy idea! She knows they come from, ahem, down below!!!!
I calmly answered honestly, and then followed up on her statement. I was eager to know where she got this info from. I mean, she doesn’t know about periods yet!
So, the font of her knowledge was…. her brother! Really?!! I told him not to mention these things to his little sister, but then, that’s your typical brother! Lil Man couldnt help it.
I asked her what she know exactly.
“It’s a bit inappropriate to talk about mummy, you know that! It’s about ‘special cuddles’!”
(We had been to see frogs in the school pond with my class, and in the morning there was a pond full of frog on frog action happening, then when we took the afternoon kids, the pond was teeming with freshly laid frogspawn. When asked what the frogs were doing, my colleague answered that they were just having ‘special cuddles’! The term has now stuck in my family, to descrive what my kids call ‘innapprpriate behaviour’!)
Then she said, “Oh mummy, everyone knows it in my playground, they all talk about it!”
Really??!! A bunch of eight and nine year olds having conversations about sex?!
Well, we had a short, frank conversation about the basics, so she wasn’t being fed wrong information, and left at that for now.
But since then, she has been much more open with me about any of these issues!
Oh my, the fun of being a mum to Tweens!
And another thing…
She made me a chart.
Me!
A CHART?!?
Why do I have a chart?
Because on the weekend, I had a meltdown. The kids were driving me insane, Hubby Dearest was out, and they were arguing, winding each other up, not listening, being kids…
I ended up in tears, literally.
Later in the evening, my daughter presented me with the above. My very own chart.
“Mummy, I’m going to keep this chart for you. You don’t get angry, you get a point on the happy side. You shout at us, you get a point on the angry side. It will help me too, you try not to get angry, I will try not to get angry too. We can help each other!”
(Considering half the time I get angry is because of her behaviour, humph! But still, at least she is acknowledging that she needs to calm down too, in a roundabout way!)
So, this is how I have ended up with a behaviour chart. Me. The mum!
And now I must be off, need to get ready to welcome that Lil Man into his final tween year tomorrow!!!!
Have a great day Peeps!
Do let me know if you have ever been made a chart by your kids!!!
